What if I am Catholic, but have not been Confirmed?

First of all. Don’t panic about this question. But it deserves an adequate explanation, see the following I wrote for Louis….

Dear Fr. Rob,

I am a baptized Catholic, but have never been Confirmed. Must I receive Holy Communion & Confirmation prior to being married?

Sincerely,

Louis

Dear Louis,

There is no simple “yes” or “no” answer to this question. I offer this explanation which is taken from the Code of Canon Law (the official law of the Catholic Church)……note that I have highlighted some parts in red.

THE RECEPTION OF CONFIRMATION, PENANCE, AND THE EUCHARIST

1983 Code of Canon Law: Text and Commentary

The text of the law:

Canon 1065 – 1. If they can do so without serious inconvenience, Catholics who have not yet received the sacrament of confirmation are to receive it before being admitted to marriage.

2. It is strongly recommended that those to be married approach the sacraments of penance and the Most Holy Eucharist so that they may fruitfully receive the sacrament of marriage.

The commentary (explanation of the law):

The reception of baptism is necessary for the valid reception of the sacrament of matrimony. The reception of the sacraments of confirmation, penance, and Eucharist is strongly recommended for Catholics who enter a sacramental marriage (including a mixed marriage) as well as those who enter a disparity of cult marriage. Although following this recommendation is not necessary for the validity of the marriage, it is urged in virtue of the faith dimension of marriage as well as the ecclesial obligations.

CONFIRMATION

The present Code repeats the legislation of the 1917 Code (CIC 1021, 2) which urged the reception of confirmation before marriage. Commentaries on the 1917 Code and the marriage law committee which helped to formulate the present Code say little about canon 1065. Mention is limited to concern for the nature of the obligation and reasons for allowing non-confirmed persons to marry. In any event a willingness to be confirmed is presumed.

Some commentators hold that receiving confirmation is a grave obligation and others state that it is light. Those who hold to the gravity of the obligation relate confirmation to the strengthening of faith needed to respond to the graces of the sacrament of marriage. Cappello relates the obligation to the fulfilling of the purpose of marriage. Since this includes the acceptance of children and their education in the worship of God, parents must be confirmed in the same faith in which they will raise their children.”

The confirmed Catholic is charged with communicating the faith by word and example. In marriage this is primarily realized through the community of the whole of life wherein the spouses assist each other by mutual sanctification and growth in faith. It is also accomplished by the nurture of the life of faith of their children.

PENANCE

Prior legislation treated the question of confession before marriage from a juridical and theological viewpoint. Prior to the 1917 Code, particular legislation in certain dioceses made confession before marriage an absolute requirement.”

The 1917 Code (CIC 1033) used the words “strongly exhort” since confession (and communion) are not strictly a matter of precept in the context. It is “strongly recommended” (enixe commendatur) in the present canon that penance be received prior to marriage; however, it is not an absolute requirement for the sacrament of marriage.

Theologically, penance is recommended in view of the traditional teaching that marriage is a sacrament of the living. In this context the law is concerned with the proper dispositions of those about to marry. Since the marital covenant requires a self-less commitment of the parties one to another in view of their special role in the life of the community, those who make this commitment should be in the state of grace, having been reconciled to God and His Church.

EUCHARIST

The exchange of consent within the Mass in marriages of two Catholics and a Catholic and a baptized non-Catholic emphasizes the intimate relationship of the Eucharist to the sacrament of marriage.

Marriage is a human reality founded on reciprocal love. As a sacrament, marriage reflects the covenant between Christ and His Church and is the efficacious sign of this New Covenant. It is symbolized in marriage by the reciprocal and indissoluble commitment of the spouses. Since the Eucharist is the nuptial banquet of those sharing in the covenant between Christ and His Church, it is fitting that Catholic spouses partake in it at their wedding since they are committing themselves to a life which should reflect the reality of the union of Christ and His Church.

Sacramental marriage is more than an example of the New Covenant. It is also a means of accomplishing it. Like the Eucharist, marriage is ordered to the building up of the Body of Christ. The place of the Eucharist in a marriage relationship is made clear when marriage and the family are considered as the basic Christian community or a “little Church.” Since the time of Vatican Council II, Church documents refer to the role of the spouses in building up the Church.” The Eucharist, the center of the Church, should also be the center of the marital community.

The exhortation to receive the Eucharist is more a pastoral than legal concern. It is included under proximate preparation for marriage because of the importance of spiritual preparation for marriage.

Although marriage cannot be prohibited or delayed solely because one or both spouses refuse to receive the Eucharist, the reasons for such a refusal should be carefully examined by the pastoral minister as he assesses the overall readiness for marriage. It is somewhat incongruous for certain Catholics habitually to reject the Eucharist from their lives and at the same time request sacramental marriage, which is so intimately related to the Eucharist.

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