Vocation6 - What about your calling - J M

What About Your Calling?

Dear Friends... I was prompted to write this for you in response to a question asked of me during our last Zoom mtg. We were talking about dealing with unfinished emotional business from our pasts. I shared about an emotional ‘freefall/tailspin’ period that I had undergone. And someone asked me: “How did you break out of that freefall?” And my answer was: “Jesus Christ. He was the one that pulled me out of it.”

Brothers, that answer was pathetically inadequate. But our Zoom time was so limited that it’s impossible to do justice to such a complex issue. So I feel led to share more info. It comes from hard-won experience, and I suspect that the subject may affect a lot of us, in one way or another.

Much of my ‘hard-won experience’ came about as a result of what I learned about that apparently terminal tailspin, after the Lord eventually freed me from it and led me back into the world of ‘Christian Ministry’. He put me into a situation where I was put in charge of helping people that would come in off the street or would be referred by others. In no time there were more needy people calling and wanting to make appointments than I could possibly handle. So it was obvious I’d have to deal with them in groups, rather than one-on-one. So I needed a curriculum designed for use in a support group format. I called it, ‘The Christ-Life Solution’.

According to instructions I believe the Lord gave me, I modeled the new material after the story of those whipped, disenfranchised slaves that Moses was sent to lead out of Egypt in the Book of Exodus. And it naturally fell into three separate phases:

1. Phase I: Egypt (Our Past – Childhood: Infancy to adolescence leading into young adulthood. We do inventory concerning our unfinished past issues we’re dragging along with us that contaminate and spoil our present relationships and attempts to have a ‘decent life’. We learn to resolve those issues and grieve our losses so we can be free to move into the future, free and unencumbered)

2. Phase 2: The Wilderness of Transition (Our Present –  We learn what God’s Solution is: The Gospel that requires us to forsake and leave behind our pre-Christ lives and ways, in order to enter into the absorption and application of God’s Gospel Realities.

3. Phase 3: The Land of Promise (Our God-given Future – We learn to live in and absorb and adopt our new Life in and from our risen indwelling Lord. And we learn to grow and mature and develop our new Christ-in-me identity, purpose and lifestyle as Spirit-empowered New Covenant disciples.)

What I learned about dealing with soul wounds from past issues is this: If we can’t resolve our ‘unfinished emotional business from the past, and effectively ‘hit the clear button’ on our onboard emotional, mental and spiritual experience-processing equipment, the only other thing we can do with that voltage is to try to keep it stuffed inside and conceal it from those around us. But that causes extremely powerful steam-like emotional energy to circulate around within us! And if it can’t be vented and resolved, it recycles over and over into crazy addictive destructive loops, like a concealed ticking bomb just waiting for something or someone in the future to unwittingly ‘jiggle’ it and set it off. And as those periodic ‘explosions’ recur, we suffer enormous spiritual, relational and emotional damage... against ourselves... and anyone unfortunate enough to be involved with us.

Modern societies are rife with this stuff. You find it embedded within organized religion, academia, and the worlds of science, corporate enterprise, entertainment, athletics, and the halls of government... not to mention the city streets, slums, and elite gated communities and well-heeled suburbs.  So the ‘Exodus Pattern’ the Lord gave me to follow and write out is the enormous transition required by His Gospel of Salvation by which we’re required to die to trying to ‘fix ourselves’ by trying to run and control lives of our own (religious or otherwise).

All of that is ‘Humanism’ in disguise... the worship of the natural original ‘life’ we all inherit from Adam. It drives us to live existences that are radically independent of our Creator/Redeemer. They push Him out of our ‘self-image’ picture. Thus by default, we become the ‘hero of our own story’ and ‘star of our show’. But that keeps us in the state of Sin, so this is what the Lord crucifies and puts to death when He summons us to follow Him:

“If anyone wants to come after Me, he must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow Me. For whoever wants to save his (Self) life will lose it; but whoever loses his (Self) life for My sake, will find it.  For what good will it do a person if he gains the whole world, but forfeits his soul? Or what will a person give in exchange for his soul?  For the Son of Man is going to come in the Glory of His Father with His angels, and will then repay every person according to his deeds.” (Matthew 16:24-27)

So, what’s the alternative? What’s the God-given Phase 3 destination of the Exodus? What is the awesome ‘Land of Promise’ that God wants to give us in exchange for our original ‘Egypt’? It is the awesome New Covenant Solution: “Christ in you, the Hope of Glory” (Col. 1:27)... “For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.” (Phil. 1:21)...“Work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for IT IS GOD who works in you, BOTH TO WILL AND TO DO, according to His good pleasure.” (Phil. 2:12-13)

Phase 3 unpacks the elements contained in that ‘New Man in Messiah’... Spirit-empowered Christ-Life... by which our risen Messiah Himself can finally live and operate from within us... God’s Living Word Himself enters into us to be and do, in our name, what only God can be and do. Thus God meets and satisfies His own Perfect Standards and fulfills all the revelation, commandments and promises contained in His written Word and Plan. God’s Word does it... through our flesh and in our name. And we serve as His personal ‘image and likeness’.

So, it’s an Exodus, not by self-improvement exertions, but, by death to Self and resurrection transition into Christ! That’s ‘The Christ-Life Solution’. (By the way, that support Group process is still going strong coast to coast and border to border... but the material has been renamed. Now it’s called, ‘The Ultimate Journey’ (for the Exodus Pattern that it follows).  

And here’s what I learned about the Lord and His ways, after He rescued me from my personal nose dive and tailspin in 1966.  Several months latter I landed in Southern California, I began to develop a recurring ‘Judas Nightmare’ that would occur 3-5 times a week and leave me filled with waves of toxic shame, guilt, and condemnation. No matter what I tried to do to make it stop, I failed. I was like a man condemned to carry a rotting corpse, chained to his back. And no matter what I tried to do to free myself, I couldn’t. So at that time, it was my firm belief that God couldn’t stand the sight of me:

I knew the Lord had called me into His service. And I had tried to do what I could to follow the Lord’s call. But after my class began to be exposed to Scripture for the first time... within a few months I began to undergo some massive paradigm-shifts... until all the wheels on my wagon broke and came apart... and I skidded to a dead stop. My belief system changed so radically that I could no longer believe in what I was doing. It no longer seemed genuine and I no longer felt ‘real’. I lost all sense of direction and motivation. Now, it was no longer a matter of whether or not I would continue to serve God; it was a matter of whether or not I was going to snap and lose my mind... or get out and do my best to ‘reset’ and try to start over.

That nightmare era lasted fifteen years. So I’d drink, smoke, cuss, use porn and drive myself to overwork... to distract and drag my mind as far away as possible from the monstrosity my ‘life’ had turned out to be. To remember what I’d been or done in the past was like having my hand forced down upon a red hot grill! So needless to say, I didn’t regret leaving and didn’t for an instant consider going back to try it again. And pity any poor wretch that would dare come around and start talking to me about ‘God’... or ‘getting saved’!  

I created false fronts to hide behind, to convince whoever might be around that I was doing just fine. But the load of unfinished emotional business I had stuffed inside was like an enormous storm of emotional voltage I didn’t dare let anyone know existed. My addiction cycles enabled me to keep it fairly ‘frozen’ so that it wouldn’t spew out and expose me for what I really was. So... now comes the question: how did I finally manage to pull myself out of that nose dive? And the answer is, I didn’t. Someone totally unexpected came after me... and He did it.

One afternoon in late November, 1981... I experienced the shock of my life! The One I’d been accused of betraying and abandoning... the One I had studiously tried to uproot and erase from my heart (so I could erase the Judas in my brain)... suddenly invaded my space and let me know how REAL and ALIVE and IRREPRESSIBLE HE REALLY IS! My wife and newly adopted son, were on an extended shopping trip. So I was alone... putting my laundry away in a dresser, when His unmistakable Presence suddenly flooded the room. IT WAS THE LORD! I knew it instantly. And what happened next has to remain mostly between Him and me. I can’t even begin to comprehend, explain or put it into words. All I can say is that when I was finally able to talk... these are the words I managed to utter:

“Lord, if You’re really here... if it’s really You... I can’t understand why You would even want to be around me... But... if it’s really You... I want you to know that I can’t stand the thought of spending one more day on this earth without You. I would rather die right now and go to Hell, and get it over with... rather than spend one more day, like this... apart from You.

“So if it’s really You... Lord, and if there’s anything in this mess that I have become that You would still want... would You please TAKE ME BACK? If You do, I’ll do anything You say. And You can do whatever You want with me Lord... if You’ll just please Lord... please... TAKE ME BACK!

And He did!... and it dawned on me that He had come after me... to reclaim what is eternally His property. He took me back, because I’ve always been His... since before this universe ever came to be! And since then He’s been cleansing, purifying, healing, restoring, correcting, disciplining, training and teaching me to abide with Him, and to live FROM HIM... at all times... ON HIS TERMS!  

“No longer do I call you slaves, for the slave does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, because all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you. You did not choose Me but I CHOSE YOU AND APPOINTED YOU THAT YOU WOULD GO AND BEAR (MY) FRUIT, and that your fruit would remain, so that whatever you ask of the Father in My Name He may give to you.” (John 15:15-16 Amplification and emphasis added.)

So I suppose it’s because I’ve never seen anybody in all my years that has been anywhere close to being in as bad of shape as I once was. And that’s what equipped me to understand what other people were going through... and it motivated me to try to reach out to the ones who were deeply hurt and emotionally ‘gutted’, and totally stuck. The message I had to share was, I suppose:

“If God can restore a monumental ‘Basket Case’ like me... just imagine what He’ll be able to do with and for you!”

And, on that basis, the Christ-Life/Ultimate Journey material I wrote went into action. And since it began in the late 1980’s more people than I can keep track of have been profoundly helped and impacted. I knew in my gut how they felt and what they were up against, and Who they desperately needed.

‘Been there, done that, got the T Shirt’!

So I’ve reached the point of this account that I want to share with anyone among us that may be hurting and grieving over similar issues. I especially want to draw our attention to ‘The Calling’ that we have all received from the Lord. I want to share some shockingly wonderful GOOD NEWS. And it’s not just based on any subjective opinion, hunch or ‘feeling’ of mine. I didn’t make it up. It’s God-given revelation straight from His written Word. So let me first offer a prenote about the Truth, Power and Authority that is contained in God’s written Word:

Notice what happened to the Lord at the very beginning of His public ministry in Israel (Matthew 4). It was Father’s idea to lead His beloved Son to fast for 40 days in the wilderness... specifically so that He could be put to the acid test by the Father of Lies. And Satan began to tempt Him in various ways. So notice how the Lord countered that attack. No matter what ploy Satan tried, the Lord kept quoting from God’s written Word (in this case, Deuteronomy). This is what He wants all of us to learn: The Living Word of God used the written Word of God... (which Ephesians 6 calls, ‘The Sword of the Spirit’) to attack and slice through any and all demonic lies, tricks and traps. The Lord demonstrated that whenever the written Word is used against the Father of Lies, its God-breathed Authority and Truth cuts the Prince of Darkness off at the knees, so to speak. And so he doesn’t have a leg to stand on, nor can he find any openings in us... by which to vent his rage and malice, and do us harm.

‘It is written... It is written... It is written!’ That’s what God wants our response to be to our demonic enemies, and earthly impossibilities... regardless of what traps, delusions and baited hooks the demonic powers may try to dangle before us. The power and authority in God’s Word is like artillery shells blasting through the ranks of our demonic predators! God’s written Word catalogues everything God has already done to cover all of His Creation’s needs. So instead obsessing over what our circumstances and feelings may be telling us, if we stand on the solid ground of God’s revealed Word, we remain privy to the Eternal Treasury of Grace that is packed into God’s Word. And against that, the powers of Darkness have no defense. And they can’t get to first base on anybody that realizes this.

With that in mind, let’s see what God’s Word tells us about ‘The Calling’ that each one of us received... the Call that led us to ‘drop everything’, to follow the Son of God. At that time, we believed He was calling us to ‘the priesthood’.  But that wasn’t necessarily the case. The Truth is... He only calls people to follow HIM... PERSONALLY, regardless of what else might happen or fail to happen! He wasn’t calling us to one particular place, to do just one particular thing, or to live a particular lifestyle. He was calling us to become one with HIM... to be His own personal embodiment... to abide with Him, day and night, 24/7/365! He was calling us to reveal Him... and interact with Him personally... EVERYWHERE... ALL THE TIME... REGARDLESS OF OUR EXTERNAL SITUATIONS OR CIRCUMSTANCES! He has always wanted us for Himself! Period... whether we turned out to be priests, pizza deliverers or whatever!

We can love and serve God and fulfill our calling as long as we abide as one with His beloved risen Son... and draw whatever we will be and have and do... FROM HIM. We can do that anywhere, anytime, regardless of circumstances, because the Word is always with us, ready to be our Covering... and the FUEL that enables us to embody God’s Word and keeps moving us in alignment with our Heavenly Father’s will and Plan!

Many people have been led to believe that the people of Israel (for example) although they were called and chosen to be God’s special Chosen People, have now been rejected and forsaken by God on account of their lousy ‘performance’. Many assume that because Israel violated her Blood Covenant Bond with God, and rejected her Messiah, God totally rejected her and put her away in 70 AD.  So actually, they’re accusing God of changing His mind, violating the Covenant promises He pledged His Word to keep, and dumping His original ‘beloved betrothed’... so that He could then take up with a Gentile substitute... a Plan B consort, so to speak.

But God will NEVER betray and violate His own Word! He sent His Son to spill His blood on the cross to seal His Covenants for all of eternity! Yes, Israel’s performance has been dismal and treacherous. But God knew that even before Israel existed! the Truth about God’s true Nature, Character, Disposition and Response to flaky humanity, is revealed through the story of the prophet Hosea and his incurably adulterous wife Gomer! And that airtight faithfulness of God is reinforced in Ezekiel 16, 36 & 37! And hasn’t Christianity’s performance been just as bad as Israel’s! Is He going to flush all of humanity down the toilet? Obviously not. So here is the real Truth:

“In relation to the Gospel they (unbelieving non-Messianic Jews) are enemies on your account, but in relation to God’s choice they are beloved on account of the fathers (Abraham, Isaac & Jacob);  FOR THE GIFTS AND THE CALLING OF GOD ARE IRREVOCABLE!” (Romans 11:28-29 Amplification and emphasis added.)

That goes for our calling too guys! It is irrevocable! Once called, ALWAYS CALLED! So, how does that work? Well, Ephesians gives us some great clues:

 “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, WHO HAS BLESSED US WITH EVERY SPIRITUAL BLESSING IN THE HEAVENLY PLACES IN CHRIST, JUST AS HE CHOSE US IN HIM BEFORE THE FOUNDATION OF THE WORLD, (that is, knowing by His Infinite Foreknowledge and Wisdom that by the end of this age, by His Grace and Holy Spirit, that we would eventually be redeemed and made holy and blameless before Him, by the time we reached the end of our story). 

“In love He predestined us to adoption as sons and daughters through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will,  to the praise of the Glory of His Grace, with which He favored us in the Beloved.  IN HIM we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our wrongdoings, according to the Riches of His Grace  which He lavished on us. In all wisdom and insight He made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His good pleasure which He set forth in Him,  regarding His Plan of the fullness of the times, to bring all things together in Christ, things in the heavens and things on the earth.  

“In Him we also have obtained an Inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of Him who works all things in accordance with the plan of His will, to the end that we who were the first to hope in the Christ would be to the praise of His (Eternal) Glory. In Him, you also, after listening to the Message of Truth, the Gospel of your Salvation—HAVING ALSO BELIEVED, YOU WERE SEALED IN HIM WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT OF THE PROMISE, WHO IS A FIRST INSTALLMENT OF OUR INHERITANCE, in regard to the redemption of God’s own possession, to the praise of His glory.” (Eph. 1:3-14 Amplification and emphasis added.)

And here’s one more reassurance from God’s written Word:

“And so the heavens and the earth were completed, and all their heavenly lights.  By the seventh day God completed His work which He had done, and He rested on the seventh day from all His work which He had done.  Then God blessed the seventh day and sanctified it, because on it He rested from all His work which God had created and made.” (Genesis 2:1-3 Emphasis added.)

Brothers... doesn’t it seem as if Father is trying to drill something into us with the above text? I believe He’s blowing a ram’s horn in our ears to make sure He gets our attention regarding the fact that He foreknew us and everything about us since eternity past... since even before any of this physical universe was created! He knew us... and everything about us... everything we would ever be or do or fail to do. He knew everything rotten and unlovable and unworthy about us... and He said: “Yes, that’s the one I want. This is the one I will create and endow with everything he (she) will need to fulfill the identity, purpose and plan I have for him (her).”

So in His Infinite Foreknowledge, the Lord knew that at a certain point in the time and space future, before we reached the end of our journeys, there would be those among us who would finally hear His voice and repent of our radical independence from Him. He knew we’d turn ourselves over to Him so that He could ‘breathe’ His Living Word and Eternal Life into the mortal Sin-corrupted dust that we are, by the Power of His Holy Spirit. So even though we may have gotten off to a rotten start, or suffered serious major crashes and catastrophes en route... He knew He would finally get through to us and we would respond... and He would be legally free to enter into our picture and take over, and fill in what was missing and complete and redeem all that pertains to us.

Isn’t that exactly the way it turned out to be with that murderous religious thug named Saul of Tarsus who took such delight in hunting down and destroying the risen Lord’s disciples in the Name of God? Who could have imagined that such an arrogant, self-righteous, brutal vicious ISIS-type guy like that, would turn out to be God’s broken devoted and utterly faithful ‘Apostle to the Gentiles?

“While so engaged, as I was journeying to Damascus with the authority and commission of the chief priests,  at midday, O king, I saw on the way a light from Heaven, brighter than the sun, shining around me and those who were journeying with me. And when we had all fallen to the ground, I heard a voice saying to me in the Hebrew dialect, ‘Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting Me? It is hard for you to kick against the goads.’ And I said, ‘Who are You, Lord?’ And the Lord said, ‘I am Jesus whom you are persecuting. But get up and stand on your feet; for this purpose I have appeared to you, to appoint you as a servant and a witness not only to the things in which you have seen Me, but also to the things in which I will appear to you,  rescuing you from the Jewish people and from the Gentiles, to whom I am sending you,  to open their eyes so that they may turn from Darkness to Light, and from the power of Satan to God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins and an Inheritance among those who have been sanctified BY FAITH IN ME!’” (Acts 26:12-18 Emphasis added.)

The great part about God’s math is how it always ends up. He provides 100% of what makes up our successful human story... and we provide 0%... because we come from Adam... fallen Sin-corrupted Adam. And Adam was created out of nothing... God breathed life into a pile of helpless totally dependent bankrupt dust, and that dust pile became a living being! And we were all included in that pile of dust! So, when we add what we put into it ( 0%), to what Father puts into it (100%)... the sum total is always: 100%! So we end up Perfect! Flawless! and totally Acceptable according to the Perfect Standards of God! God has already done all the necessary work, and then He sends His Living Word and Holy Spirit to come after us in time and space... and He summons us to come into our Inheritance... and own it... And our part in all of that is to say, “YES!” And... “THANK YOU!”  And then we can learn to hold on tight to the Lord... until we cross the Ultimate Finish Line... IN HIM!

So confreres... we really are a blessed chosen and beloved bunch! We all know we were chosen by God’s Living Word to follow Him. We know we actually responded to His call with a wholehearted ‘Yes!’ We proved it, by leaving home and going to the seminary to which we believed at that time He was calling us. That was a great start. And, regardless of how that initial assumption and beginning turned out... the real truth is that He was always actually calling us TO HIMSELF... to follow HIM... and abide as one with Him ... all the time... everywhere... forever! People like Saul of Tarsus are living proof of that!

So it wasn’t a created organized, man-controlled religious monolith that saved and called us. Nor was it an ecclesiastical lifestyle that redeemed  and summoned us. No... it was a PERSON... The Living Word of God made flesh... the risen Lord of Glory. He created, sustained, maintained, redeemed and called us. He purchased us at the price of His Atoning Blood...He is our Good Shepherd who summoned us out of the places we were occupying within the alien flock of this fallen world. We recognized our Master’s voice... and began to follow Him. And He began to separate us from the crowd... in order to make us His complete and total possession. And that was the tremendous beginning of our story with Him!

So now we know He never changes... that His gifts and calling are irrevocable, even though we’ve tripped and fallen on our faces repeatedly along the way... He always stops and gets us back on our feet. And He empowers us to ‘straighten out’ and keep on following wherever He may choose to lead. And He intends to take us all... all the way across Father’s Finish Line... So we must realize this:

Whatever the Supreme Lord begins... HE FINISHES! Not because we’re so great... but because HE IS SO GREAT!

I learned this first hand. He was incredibly patient with me and He came back for me, although I was convinced I had terminally ‘blown it’. But that was a delusion, just like Israel’s terminal abandonment is delusion. None of that comes from God... it comes from the Father of Lies! And the Lord Himself is ready to prove that all that this is not essentially about us... it’s all about HIM!

He’s here to do for all of us... what He did for Peter who betrayed Him, and Saul who persecuted Him. We’re free at any time to turn to Him and say, “YES LORD! I’M READY TO RESUME OUR JOURNEY!” And then we can hold on tight to Him; and He will take it from there...

“Lord, You have searched me and known me.  You know when I sit down and when I get up; You understand my thought from far away.  You scrutinize my path and my lying down, and are acquainted with all my ways.

“Even before there is a word on my tongue, behold, Lord, You know it all.  You have encircled me behind and in front, and placed Your hand upon me.  Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is too high, I cannot comprehend it.

“Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your Presence?  If I ascend to Heaven, You are there; if I make my bed in Sheol, behold, You are there. If I take up the wings of the dawn, if I dwell in the remotest part of the sea, even there Your hand will lead me, and Your right hand will take hold of me.

If I say, “Surely the darkness will overwhelm me, and the light around me will be night,”
even darkness is not dark to You, and the night is as bright as the day. Darkness and light are alike to You. For You created my innermost parts; You wove me in my mother’s womb.

“I will give thanks to You, because I am awesomely and wonderfully made; wonderful are Your works, and my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from You when I was made in secret, and skillfully formed in the depths of the earth; Your eyes have seen my formless substance; and in Your book were written all the days that were ordained for me, when as yet there was not one of them.

“How precious also are Your thoughts for me, God! How vast is the sum of them!  Were I to count them, they would outnumber the sand. When I awake, I am still with You.” (Psalm 139: 1-18)

Brothers... the call you and I received is eternal and irrevocable. Father never changes His mind about any of us. He knew everything about us in advance... He knew we were the ones He wanted. Regardless of what happened or failed to happen in the past... there’s always right now. And He’s always here with us... and we can turn to Him and say, “Thank You Lord... for being so Patient with me. Here I am... I say ‘Yes’ to whatever You have planned! You’ll never be rid of me Lord... because I know You are the One who is never going to let me go!

“At that time Jesus said, “I praise You, Father, Lord of Heaven and Earth, that You have hidden these things from the wise and intelligent, and have revealed them to infants. Yes, Father, for this way was well pleasing in Your sight.  All things have been handed over to Me by My Father; and no one knows the Son except the Father; nor does anyone know the Father except the Son, and anyone to whom the Son determines to reveal Him.

“Come to Me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you Rest.  Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For My yoke is comfortable, and My burden is light!” (Matthew 11:25-30 Emphasis added.)